i think i tried to ask one of my male friends on a date type thing earlier and he didnt get the hint? it was weird
i’m not sure that i’m wary of labelling myself ‘bisexual’ i think i’m more wary of labelling myself anything like i’ll just do whatever, like whoever, and anything else and i just dont want to be classed as anything
i need to stop complaining about how bad i feel all the time or im gonna loose friends…….. but if i dont get everything out i feel worse
I try to explain to my mum that everything is bleak and I don’t know why and now she pissed because everything she said made me feel worse and when she asked if I wanted to be left alone I said yeah
it was a two second though…. gone as soon as it was realised… but the thought was there and the urge was real and i cant cope with this again i’m better i’m so much better i’m so scared
"but i like watching the drama from afar too much to leave this group" so you’d stay in a group of friends even though you know it’s tearing me up so badly that i cry half the time and is driving me to the fucking edge so u can get some laughs? what kinda friend does that??
thinking about it I mean if they thought I was busy they wouldn’t have thought of telling me? and rly I shouldn’t be upset but I hurt that they didn’t at least mention it so I could get out of my plans as they weren’t exactly solid
I think the scariest part of feeling this bad so often is tht I worry I’m going back the way and im gonna become tht big emotional mess again that I was last year and the year before and nothing is worse than that thought right now